The Art of C H A O S
by Lazy one
Summary: Joker is now locked up in Arkham. Things in Gotham seem pretty calm without the Clown Prince. But he recieves a strange visitor that promisses changes and a new chapter in Gotham's history.
1. The Art of C H A O S 1

First chapter - First time I write a Fan Fiction - Be nice?

For those who are curious the song in this story is by Tom Waits - Chocolate Jesus!

--

"No I don't go to church on Sundays..."

The silence of the infamous asylum that hided itself behind the dark skies over Gotham city seemed to creep out the spine of every single guard and doctor that walked through the already dark halls. The city itself seemed awfully quiet that night. Not even the usual traffic seemed to be heard. Not even the wind seemed to dare to make the slightest sound that night. The only sound that could be heard was a voice. Someone was singing…although you could hardly say that, what that insane man was doing, could be considered singing.

"…Don't get on my knees to pray."

His voice was grim and low. Every word that came out from his red lips seemed to be said carefully, slowly, giving a more terrifying feeling to the entire song. His voice didn't have melody. That song didn't have any instruments playing along. Only silence. The man's voice echoed inside his room. The room where he passed most of the time. Inside of that prison where every mad men like himself ended up in.

"Don't memorize the book of the bible..."

Although his voice was hardly heard outside of his room, the mere sound of it made the halls of Arkham seem terribly hostile. Unwelcoming anyone who even thought of disturbing the man who sat on the top of his bed while singing this terribly grim song. But there was a small sound of footsteps. It was low at first, echoing through the entire asylum. They pressed quickly against the cold floor, like they were in a hurry. And although everyone could hear them, the song didn't stop.

"…I've got my own special way…"

The steps became louder. It was certain that who ever came there was in a hurry. The singing man couldn't help but to show a large smile, hearing a small hesitation once the steps stopped, right in front of his room's door. Who ever that person was seemed nervous. Perhaps even frightened. That seemed to delight the now smiling man. The door opened, revealing a young guard. He had pale skin and beautiful blue eyes that seemed to shake while looking at the man sitting in front of him, hidden by the darkness of the room. Yet, the guard tried to find courage and placed his hands on his belt, trying to show how confident and brave he was. "You have a visit, Mr. Kerr."

The man remained on his sit, like he had ignored the boy. But even between the darkness, the guard could quickly tell that the man turned his head in his direction. And both of his green eyes looked right at him, making the young man swallow nervously. Between the dark, he was only able to see two small green shining points, directly staring at him with frustration. But slowly a large white amount of teeth shined in the dark and a small chuckle invaded the room. "Mr. Kerr? That makes me feel rather _old_." The man calmly got up, making the young guard give a small step back, his hands grabbing his belt tight. "I have a real name, sonny boy!" The smiling man said in a cheerful tone, two pale hands came out from the dark while the figure walked in his direction. "Why don't you call me _Uncle Joker_?"

The Clown Prince of Crime stood there in front of the guard, a huge disturbing red smile seemed to fright the young man even more than his penetrating eyes. It was him. The Joker. All locked up in good old Arkham. It wasn't his first visit to the place. No, Joe Kerr had been there before. Not by his free will of course. It was all the Big Bat's fault. He was the one who squished his every plan like an annoying fly, caused terribly fractures to the man and then threw him to that dirty asylum. Oh, how the Harlequin of Hate wished he could get the Bat's neck between his two hands and make him struggle for air…

While entering the visit room, Joker had already been hand-cuffed by the same guard. They believed that by hand cuffing him, they would prevent the Joker from scratching someone's eye out. It had happened before. But suddenly the infamous villain found himself wondering who could be the kind soul who had decided to pay him a visit…at one in the morning. It was way passed the visiting hour. And Joker didn't recall having any girlfriend or family member who'd be so desperate to see him that would perform some kind of subornation to the guards, and perhaps the owners, of Arkham. He was suddenly curious, but seemed to simply blink his eyes in disappointment when seeing a person wearing a large hat and a coat, hiding its face.

The Joker lazily sat down on his uncomfortable chair, and his cuffed hands reached out for the phone that allowed him to hear the person sitting behind the glass. "Good afternoon, Mr. Joker." A feminine voice spoke. It was a rather calm and mature one. The mad man's eyes narrowed, trying to see the face that hided behind the shadow that the hat gave. "Are you one of my _fans_?" The man asked in a mocking tone while using only two fingers to press the phone against his ear. "It seems the entire 'Anarchy' thing is pretty popular amongst teenage girls these days…" The Joker gave a small snort while his eyes kept staring at the person in front of him. "So; what are you here for? You want my autograph? Ask me some 'personal' questions? Promise me you'll get me out of Arkham?" The smiling man leaned forward, getting closer to the glass while showing a devious smile. "Perhaps offer me a piece of your underwear?"

The pale man chuckled, like he had told a terribly amusing joke. But the woman in front of him didn't seem to find it amusing. Her hand grabbed the phone tighter, feeling a small wave of anger running down her arm. But she didn't make any other movement or sound that revealed how upset she really was. "I can't say I'm a fan of yours, Mr. Joker." The calm voice paused. "I must confess, I found many of your actions rather…reckless and terribly violent for my own personal taste." The Joker's smile became smaller. That voice was terribly calm. It felt like his ear was being dipped in warm honey. He didn't like it. "Regardless, we have something in common. An enemy that we both share." The man's smile grew once again, his red make-up almost reaching his ears while listening to her. He was curious again. But one answer would have to be given to him if she wanted the Joker's attention…

"And who am I speaking to at this time of the night?"

A moment of silence came up. None of the two characters seemed to move. It seemed time had stopped while the female reflected. A small sigh was suddenly heard. "…Of course. How rude of me. It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr.Joker." The woman calmly began to take her thick brown jacket off, revealing a bright green colour right under it. The Joker's eyes seemed to shine with delight when seeing that the person in front of him was wearing, what it seemed like, a bathing suit without any sleeves, long green gloves that reached her elbows. Her skin wasn't as pale as his. Not even close. It had a much livelier colour. A warmer one. "Allow me to introduce myself." The woman took out her hat, allowing long red hair fall over her shoulders. The Harlequin of Hate's smile almost vanished once seeing that woman's face. Beautiful greenish eyes shined in a natural and beautiful way. And naturally red thick lips seemed to show how full of life she was. She was gorgeous without the help of any make-up. "I am Pamela Isley." But he quickly understood… "Call me Poison Ivy."

…She was vicious to.


	2. The Art of C H A O S 2

"I am Pamela Isley. Call me Poison Ivy."

The clown prince of crime stared at the red haired woman. Both of his greenish eyes examined her entire face. Her features were so natural and yet so beautiful. That was a fine specimen of everything a man wanted. Yet, after looking at that woman, the Joker seemed to loose the interest he had before. He chuckled at her name; his chin almost touched his chest while chuckling at the woman. His pale hand grabbed the phone, but it did not press it against his ear anymore. He could tell a lot by simply looking at her. She was a feminist. One of those women who knew very well what men wanted, and wasn't afraid to use her charms to get what **she** wanted. Clearly a femme fatal of the modern times. And, judging by her clothing, a tree hugger. His eyes looked up at Pamela in a mocking way.

"Poison Ivy? You make people itchy?"

A louder laughter was heard through the room where Joker sat. All of his white teeth showed how amused he was. Pamela watched the man with a disgusted look. The way how his eyes closed tight from laughing so loudly seemed to make the red haired woman's beautiful eyes burn with anger. She had never been a great admirer of that man's work. She actually thought he was rather annoying and hysterical; a madman. But that madman seemed to be considered by all the other criminals that lurked around Gotham, the only one who could actually kill the Batman. Poison Ivy kept grabbing the phone on her hand, trying her best to hide her frown from the Joker. But his laughter suddenly stopped and his face was much closer to Pamela's. It would be mere inches away if they didn't have a glass separating them. "What's cooking, _Ivy_?"

The way how he spoke her name was slow. All of his white teeth appeared while saying the last letter of the word, like he was showing a large smirk. The red haired closed her eyes for a moment, trying to keep her thoughts in their right place, trying to not storm out or start shouting at the man. She leaned closer to the glass, just like the Joker did. Their faces were now close to each other. They would feel each others breath if it wasn't for that glass between them. Pamela's eyes examined his face for a second. He could have been a handsome man some time ago. But the acid he had fallen into had turned him into something…inhuman. Her expression was much more welcoming now, and she showed a small smile of her own. "I'm here to make a proposition."

A moment of silence came up while the Joker examined her eyes, searching for any hint of mockery or perhaps second intentions…but he didn't see anything. His smile grew wide, his hand pressed the phone closer to his ear, quickly licking his lower lip that had dried out thanks to the cold that surrounded the room. His hand-cuffs didn't allow him to open his arms wide, but he was able to place his chin over his hand. By blinking his eyes innocently, made him seem like some kind of cartoon character in love. "I'm listening." He said, his deep and creepy voice completely destroying those childlike gestures. Pamela didn't blink her eyes and released a small warm chuckle when realizing she had his attention again. Her eyes looked to both sides, like she was worried that someone would hear them, though nobody was inside any of the rooms. Her lips moved slowly, and she kept a constant smile. "What would you say, if I asked you to join forces with me?" The Joker seemed to suddenly become extremely bored. Who did that woman think she was…? Sure, the idea of running free once again pleased the Joker. He was dying to get gloomy Gotham all bubbly and cheerful again. But, although that woman was beautiful, she was making questions of a mad person. And even if Joker liked that kind of girls, that one had interrupted his chain of thought.

"Listen, _Ivy_…" He began, making a huge pause between the two words and showing a fake smile, like he was a guy on a bad date, trying to be pleasant. "…It's kind of late…I'm sure the guards you bribed are getting cranky." He said quickly licking his lower lip. Most who saw this situation would definitely say that the Joker was insane. He was trying to get rid of a beautiful red haired woman who seemed to admire him. Pamela gave a warm chuckle while letting her head fall lightly back, leaving the Joker staring at her, licking his lip once again. "No need to worry about that, Mr.Joker. They wouldn't disturb us even if I broke you out of here now." The Joker's left eyebrow raised while staring at the beautiful female. He leaned forward once again, like he was afraid someone would hear them. "What do you mean by that?" He asked, his scars making it look like he had a huge smile. Ivy gave a warm smile while hanging up the phone. They could not hear each other anymore. The Joker slowly hanged up the phone while watching the red haired woman leaving the room.

He was suddenly alone. The criminal curiously looked around him…the young guard that had handcuffed him was gone to. The green haired man narrowed his eyes. Something odd was going on. He shrugged his shoulders and got up from his chair, going in the exit's direction. But when he was about to leave the room, he heard a huge crash coming from behind him. His head slowly peeked over his shoulder to find an axe. A huge axe stuck to the glass that was once flawless. Two green gloved hands held it tight. The Joker showed now a huge yellow smile while looking at Ivy. The woman closed her eyes tight, pulling the axe from the window that wasn't broken yet. "Now that's more like it!" He said, watching with both hands handcuffed while the red haired hit the glass once again, this time the glass made a huge "Crack!" and Ivy hit it once again.

The Joker looked around him. That woman was making too much noise. The security guards should be arriving soon. But no. It felt like they were the only living creatures in the entire Asylum. At the third impact, the glass broke, making Ivy's hair cover her entire face. For a moment, all that Pamela could see was an orange colour. Her hands released the axe to take the hair from her face. But once she could see again, the Joker's face was mere inches away. She could feel the smell of his breath. It reminded her of balloons, like he had been chewing them. His big yellow smile shined in front of her. "Hi…" He said in a childish tone. Before Pamela could react, his pale hand grabbed her hair and made her fall on the floor on her back. Ivy closed her eyes tight. The impact had been strong, it made her ribs hurt. When she was about to release a moan of pain, the Joker held her hair tight while sitting on top of her belly, pointing a piece of sharp glass against the corner of her mouth.

Ivy tried to struggle, but the handcuffed man only pressed the glass harder against her skin, making her close her eyes again. "You wanna hear how I got these scars?" He asked in a casual tone. Pamela Isley kept her eyes close tight, her mouth showed her canines. She wasn't scared. She was angry. The pale man looked up, thinking which story he should tell her. He suddenly seemed to remember one and he quickly looked down at the red haired who laid there, defenceless. "You see…I used to have a sister, we were the best friends, but she always said I looked too…" He paused while noticing that Pamela's eyes were closed. "Ey…I'm talking to you. Look at me Ivy. Look at me." He said while patting her cheeks with the back of his handcuffed hand. The red haired opened her eyes and narrowed them while staring at the man. "…Anyway, she said I looked too stressed out; that I needed to relax. So, she took me out to a bar, we had a few drinks and while we were leaving the bar a group of young men began whistling at her and flirting with her…" The Joker paused to look down, like he was having a flashback. Pamela's eyes remained narrowed while looking at the ,apparently ,nostalgic man. "…I told them to leave her alone. One of the guys kicked me in the stomach while two other guys grabbed my arms. While he kicked me, I had to watch my sister get raped." His eyes blinked nervously, but his hand remained firm. "…I was petrified. I couldn't even speak. Once they saw my face…my terrified face, they laughed and said that I needed to put on a smile." The Joker's eyes seemed to be now full of anger while he grabbed the piece of glass tighter. "…I was forced to do this to myself, or I'd have to watch her get killed by them!" His voice was now full of anger. His face was again close to Ivy's, their noses almost touching. "…After doing that…they killed her anyway…" He suddenly burst out laughing, his pale face showing the marks of so much laughter. "But after that…I poked their eyes out with the same knife I'd made this scars with…" His laughter continued while he still sat on top of Ivy.

Suddenly the red haired woman punched Joker across the face, making the man actually fall to the side while she quickly got up. But the handcuffed man kept laughing while on the floor, you could feel how the laughter began to hurt his lungs. "…You're no wall flower, are ya?" He mumbled between his laughter. Pamela looked at him full of rage, her hands quickly grabbed her collar, lifting him from the floor. "I'm trying to help you, you buffoon!" She said, her voice not so sweet and warm as it was before. The Joker kept smiling, trying to stop his constant chuckling. "Watch the coat, watch the coat…" He said, trying to shrug her hands off of him. Pamela finally released him and looked full of hate at the Joker while he tried to smooth the wrinkles of his clothing. "You were honestly thinking about killing me?" She asked, placing both hands on her hips. The Joker looked at her with big sparkling eyes and began shaking his head lightly to the sides with a big smile, his eyes always set on Ivy. "Yes." And he was chuckling again. Pamela looked with narrowed eyes at him. Whatever was going inside that man's head was unhealthy. She would like to have nothing to do with it…but she had received specific orders to find him and free him. She never imagined he could be that troublesome. "There's one thing you've got to learn, Ivy: Never trust anyone."

A moment of silence came up while Pamela stared at the clown who carefully tried to open the handcuffs with a piece of glass. But he would fail to do so. The glass would break when he tried to unlock them. He gave a small upset sigh while throwing the object away. "Here you are, trying to set loose one of the worst guys that ever lurked through Gotham, hoping that I, an unpredictable and dangerous criminal, will reward you somehow." He said, each word was spoken carefully, like Ivy was some kind of student and him the teacher. Pamela Isley frowned, but her face was still pretty and seductive. Her gloved hands grabbed the axe tight and quickly yanked it from the window. She placed it over her shoulder and glared at the pale man. "I'm not expecting any reward from you, Mr. Joker. I'm just the one who came to grab the package." The man's eyes blinked a couple of times and narrowed in confusion while looking at Ivy. What was that woman talking about? "Show me your hands." She quickly said. The Clown Prince of Crime stretched his arms. Suddenly the axe Ivy was holding dropped in their direction with huge speed. But the Joker didn't even blink. Pamela wished she could have chopped his hands off. She wished she could just get rid of that annoying little man. But she couldn't. She had merely chopped the chains that held his hands together.

The Joker was now free. His hands massaged his wrists, that young guard had cuffed his wrists too tight. The criminal looked at Pamela, licking the corners of his mouth, like examining the woman. She was up to something…Obviously she was not the brains of this 'situation'. But he showed a fake smile anyway, his hand still rubbing his wrist. "Thanks." He said quickly in a dry tone. Ivy released the axe and merely walked to the exit of the visiting room, not looking at Joker anymore. She opened the door and left the room. The Joker's eyes fallowed her movements carefully. Not really expecting her to attack him or anything like that. He was enjoying the way how she walked. She didn't only have a pretty face; she also had a beautiful body. The way how she walked reminded him of a femme fatal. Joker stood there, looking at the door for a moment. A voice suddenly echoed from the other side. "Could you please hurry? We don't have much time." The Joker shrugged his shoulders and opened the door. He wasn't really ready for what he was about to see.

All the guards, all the male staff of Arkham were there, surrounding Pamela, all on their knees while admiring her curvy figure in silence. The Clown Prince of Crime had his eyes wide opened now. They looked like trained dogs, waiting for their bone to be thrown at them. Joker was actually…admired. His head moved to the left and the right, watching all the men staring at her, like hypnotized. What had that woman done to them? "Well, this is new." He said while looking at the red haired who smiled warmly while caressing some men's cheeks. Pamela chuckled in delight when understanding he was surprised. "Don't tell me you thought I was one of your hysterical teenage fans, Mr. Joker." She said with a playful smile on her lips. The Joker chuckled, showing all of his yellow teeth, he tried to make his way through the crowd of silent men. They wouldn't move to let him pass. They just kneeled there, without moving, making this task difficult. "You're too _voluptuous_ to be a teenager." Pamela's eyes narrowed once again. That man was getting on her nerves. They'd better leave that place before she just lost it. "I've found a toxin that makes men feel an extreme sense of pleasure in their bodies. Since I was the only woman _alive_ in the entire building, they'll literally kiss my feet if I want to." She said, trying to show the Joker she wasn't just a regular civilian.

The mad man was quiet now, his eyes looking at the heads of every single man in the room fallowing Pamela's movements. Both of Joker's eyes suddenly found a corpse of one nurse that once treated him. She was lifeless, her long brown hair covering her eyes. That suddenly reminded him of someone. "Say, you've killed **every** woman in the building?" He asked, his hand scratching his neck. The red haired woman nodded without looking at him. "Even…what's her name…? Dr. Harleen Quinzel…?" He asked, trying to remember if that was really her name. Pamela walked side by side with the Joker, through the halls of Arkham. They passed by a few lifeless bodies that rested on the floor, but Joker didn't even seem to notice them. Ivy shrugged her shoulders. "Perhaps... Why? Was she important?" The Joker shook his head while taking his eyes from the beautiful woman, looking forward. "Nah." He answered indifferent.

They finally left the building, leaving the Asylum full of quiet and confused men and dead women. Both Joker and Ivy hadn't noticed, but while they left the building they did pass by Dr. Quinzel. There she was, lying on the floor, her glasses broken by her side, her cheek pressing against the ground. Her once beautiful face was pale. There was blood running down her nose, both of her eyes closed. Resting in peace. But when she heard the door closing behind the Joker, a huge gasp escaped from her red lips while her blue eyes widened to their maximum. It seemed like that woman had just returned from the dead…


	3. The Art of C H A O S 3

Disappointment

Disappointment.

That was the adjective that described Joker's expression. That so called 'Poison Ivy' had definitely caught the Clown Prince of Crime's attention. Not only was she a beautiful young thing, she also had been able to make every single man in the Asylum fall on their knees, quite literally. But now, while they walked away from that huge dark prison for the insane, Joker spotted their vehicle. It was a beautiful Volvo from 1971. A classic, Joker liked old cars…but that one was pink. A light pink colour covered the beautiful car. Now, Joker had nothing against that colour. Nothing at all. But that car had, at least it looked like it, a huge red rose on the top. The pale man licked his lips before getting closer to Ivy and pointing at the car with both hands. "Doesn't that often make you…the centre of the attentions?" He asked, whispering to her ear, like he was afraid the trees would hear him. Both of her seductive eyes stared at Joker while her pink lips gave a small smile.

"And here I thought you liked grasping people's attention."

The green haired man rolled his eyes and his shoulders shrugged while his red lips gestured a small _Duh_. "Of course I like attention…but this…" He pointed with disgust at the huge rose. "…This is just sad." The last word was said slowly, like he was underlining it. This didn't make Pamela very happy. Her smile quickly disappeared. Every second that passed, Poison Ivy seemed to despise that man more and more. _"Now calm down Ivy. This guy is the only one who can actually kill the Ba…" _Suddenly his pale hand was holding Ivy's shoulder tight while pointing in her car's direction with one long finger. "There's somebody in your car, Itchy!" Both of her beautiful eyes seemed to forcibly close, like she was about to explode. His hysterical and mocking voice seemed to hit some kind of nerve, making both of Ivy's hand close into fists. But suddenly Joker's hand was hurting her. His nails were sinking in her skin making her wince. The Clown was now much more serious.

"You better not be up to any kind of _Joke_, Itch."

The red haired gave a small nervous chuckle, trying to not show the pain she was in. "You still don't trust me, Mr. Joker? That man inside the car is my employer. The one who asked me to rescue you." His eyes blinked a couple of times and he finally released the woman's shoulder, walking quickly, like he wanted to get to the car first. His pale hand quickly opened the car's door and peeked inside. He had to title his head to its maximum, making his ear almost touch his shoulder. But when he looked inside he saw just a dark silhouette. A quite short and fat one. Joker narrowed his eyes while twitching his nose to the side. The dark figure's head slowly turned in his direction, and the mad man could swear he saw a smile shining. "Mr. Joker! It is a pleasure to finally meet you!"

The voice was terribly amusing. The man sounded like he spoke with his nose. It even reminded Joker of an animal. "Allow me to introduce myself…" Joker scratched his chin. What was that bird's name again? "I am the _Penguin_." The green haired man's eyes widened to their maximum while he snapped his fingers. "Exactly!" A man with a huge nose and disturbing teeth looked at Joker from behind his monocle. That character was quite ugly and disturbing…not to mention he smelled like sardines. But either way, Joker quickly sat down next to the short man and placed his arm around his shoulders, smiling widely.

"Penguin, my good man, has anyone told you that you look a lot like Oswald…" His fingers snapped three times while he looked up, trying to remember the second name. "…Cuddlepot?" Joker asked, looking fixedly at the short and disgusting man, his arm around his shoulders, like they were best buddies. The Penguin narrowed his eyes once Joker got the second name wrong. "It's Cobbelpot." He mumbled without moving his mouth. "Right! That rich bastard with the big nose and the umbrella; you look just like him." The pale man's smile never disappeared, his nose was almost touching Penguin's…but it seemed to only make the short criminal upset. "I happen to be that _rich bastard._ PAMELA!" His voice shouted her name loudly, making Joker's right ear hurt.

The beautiful red haired woman entered inside the car, still rubbing her shoulder. Joker's eyes shifted in her direction for a short second. He knew she hated him. It was so obvious. The way how her pretty eyes seemed to twitch every time he smiled at her. Such a serious and elegant young thing, ready to blow up at any second. He liked Ivy. Pamela quickly started the car, and soon they were driving through the dark road. The Joker gave a small snort while nudging Penguin's arm. The short man didn't seem as bubbly as the green haired man was. "You've kept yourself busy haven't you Ozzy? I must say, I always loved that little club you own on the East of Gotham! Fa-bu-lous!" Joker's eyes rolled, making him sound like some blond teenager all of a sudden.

The Penguin's eye twitched a little. It was getting hard to believe that that…that_ clown _was the only one who could bring the Batman down. But who could blame the Dark Knight? Even Oswald Cobblepot was beginning to loose his marbles just by sitting next to him. Yet he was able to breathe in and give a small friendly (but still creepy) chuckle at the Joker. "Yes...Mr. Joker, you must know a busy man like me wouldn't just set you free from Arkham for feeling generous!" The bird man said, a large disturbing smile on his face. The Clown Prince of crime had now decided to keep a little distance between both of them. He wanted to listen…although he already had a small idea of what was going inside the little man's head.

"It seems we share an enemy...a small pain in the neck that keeps coming back." A moment of silence came up while Oswald leaned closer; like that name gave them bad luck. "…The Batman." Both of Joker's eyes widened while his mouth opened. A terrible laugh seemed to invade the car. It was the Joker's laugh. That sound seemed to cause chills through everyone's spine. Even the Penguin and Ivy seemed to feel slightly intimidated and glanced at each other with interrogative expressions. "Batman and I? Enemies?" The pale man's head fell back while he laughed. He suddenly looked back at Penguin with a much more serious look. But, once again, his scars made it look like he had a constant smile upon his face. "Why…The Big Bat is my other half, Ozzy. He completes me…" The Penguin's eyes were wide open while looking at the Joker. His serious eyes seemed totally absorbed while he spoke about the Big Bat. He believed in those words…it kind of disturbed him.

"Either way…He is constantly making our lives much more difficult. And it's not just you, me and Ivy's; this town is…is…" The Joker blinked lazily while clacking his tongue. "Changing?" The Penguin nodded with a frustrated expression. "Yes! I used to be like…like some kind of King around this place! I owned almost every single business in Gotham! Until that Goddamned Batman appeared. Now what do I have? A shabby club and numerous invitations for reality shows!"

The Joker widened his eyes while showing a small smile. "Ouch." He said amused by that last sentence. The Penguin shook his head while giving a small depressed sigh. "Men like us won't survive for much longer if we just sit back and watch the Bat take over Gotham…" His small fat hands were suddenly grabbing a bottle of champagne, letting the sparkling drink drop inside of a perfect crystal glass. The Penguin suddenly looked at Joker with a serious expression. "We need to get rid of him!" But the man couldn't help but to let a small chuckle escape from his red lips. Of course they needed to get rid of him! Joker had said that since the first day he saw the Dork Knight running around the city! His hand quickly grabbed Penguin's glass and nodded at him with wide eyes. "Yes, yes you do!" And he quickly drank the champagne inside of the glass, like it was water.

While watching the mad man drink the expensive drink, Oswald narrowed his eyes slightly while giving a sigh. That man…**That **man who seemed to be constantly mocking about everything and that seemed to not give a damn about the consequences of his acts…That was Batman's nemesis? Either way, all of the Penguin's teeth clinched while he glared at the Joker. "We need your help…" The Clown Prince of crime suddenly looked at Penguin, his eyes wide and his mouth full of champagne that he quickly swallowed. "Excuse me?" He said quickly placing his hand near his ear, trying to hear better. The Penguin seemed to twitch his nose before saying it again, a little bit louder. "…We…need your help." He admitted.

A bright yellow smile spread across his face. The Joker seemed to love hearing that from one of the richest men in Gotham. He sat back and crossed his legs while placing both hands behind his neck. It was in moments like those that Joker understood how powerful he actually was. He quickly licked his lips while looking at Ivy's back. "Do you need my help to, Pams?" The red haired seemed to ignore him. But the Joker could see her hand grabbing the wheel tighter than ever before. A small chuckle escaped from his red lips. "Of course you need my help, Oz! And I, being such a fine gentleman, will help you out…" The man paused while leaning forward and poking the Penguin's nose. "…For cash!" The short man didn't like that physical contact. But he chuckled at the man's words. "I thought you didn't care about money."

The pale man rolled his eyes while shrugging his shoulders. "Well, I **am **starting a new life, ain't I?" For a moment, Joker could swear even Pamela was smiling. A sudden cheerful mood seemed to surround him. Everyone was satisfied…at least for now. Joker didn't know if he'd just get bored. It could happen. Although this team of his was rather interesting, he didn't see himself working under their rules. It had to be the other way round. Suddenly an immense light seemed to surround him. It made his eyes narrow. It was like everything was turning white. Whatever it was, the Penguin and Ivy also saw it. But Pamela was the only one who seemed to understand what it was. "Who the…?" Before her voice could finish that sentence, something hit the back of their car, making all of them move forward.

The Penguin's fat hands held tight to his seat. His eyes were wide open and his big hat had fallen on his lap. Poison Ivy quickly turned the wheel, trying to avoid the car behind them while the Joker simply sat there, rolling his eyes while fastening his seat belt. The Penguin tried to peek over his shoulder to see who was the person inside the car that fallowed them, his eyes showed more frustration than anything else. "Who is that?!" The Joker looked at him with a snobbish look up while he shook his head lightly. "Oh, c'mon…who else could it be?" A moment of silence came up…Penguin and Ivy switched a look of panic and suddenly, everything was upside down.

Joker blinked his eyes in a lazy way when feeling his head being pressed against the ceiling of the car. His feet were hanging in the air. For some reason it reminded him of Alice in Wonderland, falling down the rabbit hole. Except Joker wasn't falling. And he certainly wasn't an annoying and stupid teenager whose hormones seemed to affect her every way of thinking. A small moan made Joker's eyes blink a couple of times. He looked to his right. Penguin was sleeping like a baby. He poked the short man's shoulder with strength, but he didn't react. More like unconscious like a baby…So the moan had to be from young and lovely…

"Oh fuck…!"

…Ivy. The Joker chuckled when hearing her angry voice. He quickly opened the door with a strong kick. "Now, now Pam, watch your language!" Joker dragged himself out of the car and a wave of cold hair seemed to slap across his face, making his eyes close tightly. Was it this cold when they came out from the Asylum? He calmly got up, almost falling to the side due to a small hole on the road. Joker looked up, in the car's direction. A big and large black tank stood now lifeless in front of him. His red smile grew wider while he pointed at it. "You're a hard fellow to reach…I was in Arkham for five months and not **one** visit!" He placed his hand over his heart while he shook his head. "It broke my little heart." Joker's voice had a mocking tone on it. But there seemed to be no response.

Instead, a huge noise came from behind him. Another door from the pink car was wide open and from it came out Pamela. Beautiful and angry Pamela. The Joker's smile seemed to curl when seeing that pretty face of hers burning with rage. Even like that she was a gorgeous sight. Her green eyes glanced at her car. The rose that was once on the top was now next to the car. Small red pieces all over the floor of what was once a beautiful sculpture. Oh, it made her angry alright. Not only that, her pink car was ruined. The Penguin could have brought his limo, but no! _"I can't let the public know I'm working on this for now!"_

Her hands became green fists. "That stubborn little creep…" Suddenly ,from the door that Joker had opened, crawled little Oswald. His small eyes shifted nervously to the sides his hand grasping his black umbrella tight. The Penguin quickly stood up and stopped next to Pamela. Her green eyes ignored him completely; they were too focused on the huge car in front of them. But Ivy's furious expression seemed to make the Penguin swallow with nervousness. That woman could be even more dangerous than Batman when annoyed.

Something suddenly seemed to crawl from out of the dark transport. It moved slowly and in a threatening way that made all of the three villains widen their eyes. Penguin gave a small step back, Pamela stood there like hypnotized and Joker gave a step forward his entire body shaking with excitement. It was him. After three months without any idea what he was up to, he was finally there. Joker's lovely friend. The kid who made his job fun. His straight man.

The Batman.

_First of all, sorry about my grammar folks. English isn't my first language, and I'm still learning how to handle this language (heh)._

_Second, my Joker suddenly changed…in the beginning he was a comic-like Joker…but after watching the Dark Knight…well, I couldn't help it. Heath Ledger made a great Joker! _

_BeppoMagicBicycle: Tom Waits rules _

_Capitan Deadpool: Thank you very much! You gave me strength to finish this chapter!_


	4. The Art of C H A O S 4

It was really him

It was really him.

The Batman.

Now, Joker doesn't remember ever falling in love. But he was sure that teenagers felt the way he was feeling every time they saw their boyfriends and girlfriends. His heart was beating at such a fast rhythm that it hurt his ribs. It felt like he had a cramp in his stomach just by looking at that figure. A mix of excitement and other accelerating emotions seemed to shake inside of Joker's head.

…It had been such a long time since he stood in front of his serious friend. The Batman stood now straight and serious. The huge moon behind him made him look like a mere shadow. The Joker quickly looked down at his clothing. He wore those orange suits they gave away in Arkham. "Hm…Perhaps I should have dressed up…I wasn't counting on meeting you this early, Batsy." He chuckled. Poison Ivy's eyes were wide open while staring at that dark figure…she had never seen him so close. And when the Batman turned his head in her direction, she could feel like something was stuck inside her throat.

"…**Dr. Isley?"**

The Penguin narrowed his eyes while titling his head, like he hadn't heard well and the Joker turned his head in Pamela's direction, a huge mocking grin on his face. Her pretty round eyes seemed to widen even more when hearing the man's voice…but this time it wasn't in fear; she felt curious. For a moment their eyes locked, and although Pamela couldn't see his face, she suddenly felt how surprised the Dark Knight was. He knew who she was. Could she also know him…? But her chain of thought was quickly interrupted by a loud and slow chuckle.

"Doctor? My oh my…how many university teachers did you have to _seduce_ to become one, Pams?"

The redhead could feel her blood running faster. Oh, how she wouldn't mind breaking that guy's neck. Pamela quickly gave a step forward, both of her fists closed tightly while glaring at the laughing man. "Quiet! For your information I was a Professional Botanist and Toxicologist! I could be seen in Gotham's newspapers almost every week…!" Her sweet voice loud and powerful, making the Joker stand up straight and stare at her with that big smile of his. She was telling her story. Oh, Joker loved to delight an audience with his own story. A had a different one every day! But poor Pamela Isley's life story sounded terribly…boring. The pale man interrupted her with a small chuckle.

"...And now, you run around in a green swimsuit, breaking out psychotic clowns! Good way to get a promoted, huh, PamPam?"

His voice was heavy but still mocking her. It almost sounded like he was being…sarcastic? In the middle of all that, the Penguin stood next to Ivy, his eyes shifting from the two villains to the shadow that watched them silently. And when Pamela was about to shout something back at Joker, the short and fat man seemed to explode. "Will you quit with the chit chat?!" His strange voice quickly called everyone's attention. The Penguin's once pale face was now turning slightly red with frustration.

How could they act like they were all by themselves? The Batman was standing right in front of them! The short man's hand pointed at the Dark Knight nervously. "There are more important things we should deal with, at the moment…?!" His voice seemed to tremble a little when he said _things_. But everyone seemed to stand silently, looking at the fish smelling man. Oh, things weren't going well. The Penguin shook his head while grabbing his umbrella straight. "Why must I do everything by myself?!" At a press of a button, a long blade came out from the top of the closed umbrella.

And suddenly that strange looking man was in the air. He must have jumped to be so high, pointing that blade in Batman's direction…it was almost against the laws of gravity the way that fat and short person seemed to fly in the Dark Knight's direction. That vision seemed to wake both Ivy and Joker up. They quickly understood it was time to get the party really started. The redhead quickly began running in the direction where the Batman stood, while the Joker scratched his chin, watching the entire scene.

The Penguin's blade had only hit the top of the Batmobile. His small dark eyes looked nervously to the left. But all he could see was a dark fist flying in his direction, hitting his cheek with such amazing strength that it made the small man fall from the top of the Batmobile, landing on the cold and dirty road. Right after he had knocked Penguin out, Pamela quickly jumped to the top of the huge dark car quickly trying to kick the Bat's face, but his hands quickly blocked her attack by grabbing her ankle tight. His arms wanted to throw her far away from him…but something stopped Bruce.

Instead he made a quick movement, making Ivy land on her back, her pretty little head hitting against the top of the Batmobile. The dark man stood there right in front of her, his blue eyes examining her with a mixture of confusion and frustration. How could such a respectful citizen like her end up helping criminals like the Joker and the Penguin? **"What happened to you Dr. Isley?"** Something must have happened to her…The Joker had to have done _something_ to her…he was always the mind manipulating type. But as a response, Ivy smiled warmly.

"…Where to begin? A huge passion for Mother Nature, a small lab accident with a few of my toxins, a long dated hatred for humanity and a small bird with huge amounts of money to offer…You can picture the story inside your head, can't you pretty boy?"

Pamela was suddenly sitting up and her beautiful pink lips seemed to be asking for a kiss. They pointed at Batman's face, like she was a young girl, expecting for her boyfriend's lips. But suddenly she seemed to blow something to his face. Bruce's eyes blinked quickly. His body seemed to start feeling numb while his head seemed extremely light. A toxin…she had thrown him some kind of toxin…but how could she had done that with a mere blow? Whatever it was it smelled like strawberries. Such a sweet smell…suddenly Batman found himself wondering if her lips tasted like strawberries. He found himself stretching a hand to help her up.

His head shook furiously. This was bad. Batman had to keep himself focused or else he could…

Suddenly he felt something hit the side of his head, making him fall on his knees. Pamela's high heel. The redhead's long hand grabbed firmly Batman's chin, making him look up at her. She gave a small delicious chuckle while watching his eyes blinked confusedly. "You aren't so tough after all…" Suddenly a strange sound seemed to make Ivy's eyes narrow. It sounded like a cannon ball falling from high altitudes at first. But then she realized that it couldn't be that. It had to be Penguins'…

A large explosion seemed to blow up right in front of Ivy's and Batman's eyes, making both of them fall from the top of the Batmobile, into the cold road. Pamela sat up, a furious look on her face. The little fat man was still there, lying on the road unconscious. So it had to be the Joker. He had found it…

…Penguins' bazooka.

Ivy quickly stood up, glaring at the pale man that held the bazooka over his shoulder, a big amazed smile on his face. But Pamela was not smiling. "What do you think you're doing?!" She yelled, her once beautifully groomed hair now covering half of her face. The villain widened his eyes while giving a small apologetic smile. "What did you expect? I can't let a wallflower like you abuse my straight man!" He laughed. Loudly. It made Ivy's beautiful green eye twitch with anger. And suddenly the Joker was pointing the bazooka in her direction. Pamela's eyes widened while her gorgeous face seemed to become desperate with fear. The Joker licked his lips and quickly pressed the trigger.

Poison Ivy didn't move. It felt like her entire body had fallen asleep. She saw her entire life run before her eyes. A small voice inside her head always told her they couldn't trust the Joker, they just couldn't. He was insane. Oh, she only wished she could have punched the Penguin's face for convincing her to join this stupid idea of freeing Joker.

And suddenly something seemed to wrap around her waist, pulling her feet from the floor and making her fall on the road once again, the entire right side of her body felt the violent impact against the ground while a large explosion seemed to occur in the place she was once standing on. Her eyes quickly blinked once she understood there was something grabbing her wrist tightly. She smiled in a seductive way once she saw the Batman in front of her, one of his large dark hands around her slim wrist. "You're doing anything later tonight?"

Her voice was slow and warm. It tickled both of his ears. Batman answered. **"Yes."** And suddenly Pamela's wrist was surrounded by a handcuff. Her eyes widened while looking up at him. "**Delivering you all to Commissioner Gordon."** Ivy heard a small 'click' before the Bat ran in Joker's direction. He had handcuffed her to…when she looked to the right and found the fat Penguin lying there with both eyes closed she understood. She was handcuffed to him…

He had to be fast. Two of them were already down, he just needed to knock the Joker out and Gotham would still be there the next morning. But ,of course, Bruce had to leave the worst to last. While he ran in the Clown's direction, Joker shot at him several times. But the Batman was able to dodge all of his attacks somehow. And yet, that only seemed to make the Joker happier. That red smile of his…it made Bruce so angry. _"Scumbag…"_

Batman was able to reach him. His left fist violently hit one of Joker's shoulders, making him drop his bazooka on the floor. Things should be much easier now. With the back of his right fist he hit the Joker's chin, making the pale man's head fall back. He hoped that had hurt him. Yet the bastard kept on laughing. Bruce's hands grabbed Joker's orange shirt making him hit with his back against Pamela's upside down car.

Bruce could crush him. He could take his life so easily…and yet he couldn't. There was always something inside him that stopped him from breaking that clown in two. The green haired man chuckled in a low tone while watching Batman fighting the urge of breaking his nose…he could be so deliciously predictable. Joker's insane eyes didn't seem to blink while looking at Bruce. "You know Batsy, I think it's pretty clear now…we're simply meant to be!" And they were. The Joker knew his world wouldn't be the same without the big bat…and he was sure that Bat's life would have no humour without him. Yet Bruce only seemed to get angrier.

"**I'll break you like a toothpick." **

Batman's dark hand turned into a fist. The Joker gave another small giggle while closing his eyes, waiting to feel the impact of that hard fist against his face. It would hurt…but he'd laugh out loudly, making the Bat really upset. Joker loved it when the Batman was in a bad mood. And suddenly there was a loud sound. It sounded like a fist had just broken a brick wall…but Joker was surprised once he understood that his face was intact. The Batman hadn't hit him…

Both of his green eyes opened curiously. The masked man that stood in front of him seemed to lazily close his eyes and suddenly fell to the side, his long cape covering his body like a sheet. What had happened? Had he done that? Joker felt truly confused while staring at the unconscious Bat…but a voice would speak from the darkness…a loud and childish voice; a voice almost too familiar to the Joker. It actually gave him a small shiver…

"Nobody messes with _my_ puddin'!"


	5. The Art of C H A O S 5

"Nobody messes with _my_ puddin'!"

The Joker's eyes widened to their maximum when seeing his good old doctor, Harleen Quinzel, breathing heavily while holding tightly a huge cartoonish hammer, almost as big as her. Her once perfectly groomed blond hair now covered her face, and her once formal clothes were dirty with spots of blood. Oh, how beautiful she was…that insane look in her pretty baby blue eyes was priceless. The Joker gave a large grin while opening his arms wide. "Harley! Long time no see!" Once those words came out from his mouth, the once intimidating and aggressive woman was gone.

Both of her blue eyes widened and became all watery. Was she about to cry…? "Mr. Jay!!" She cried while letting her weapon fall on the floor, and wrapping her arms around the Joker's neck, making his back hit the pink car. The green haired man twitched his nose while she cried and sobbed, making him feel her tears running down his neck…even the Joker knew when someone was being a little…exaggerated. He was unsure if he should hug her back or just slap some sense into her. But his green eyes spotted the unconscious Bat, lying on the floor, and he couldn't help but to give a huge grin and put his arms around the crying doctor. "There, there, kiddo…Everything's alright."

The blond woman looked up at the Joker, her once wonderful make-up running across her face. "I…I was attacked, and…and then you weren't in your cell an-and…I followed the pre-pretty car and…" The woman kept on sobbing in the middle of her sentences. The Joker rolled his eyes while she rubbed her eyes with the back of her hands. Was he the one to blame for these over-reactions? Probably…

…Meanwhile, on the other side of the long and dark road, sat Poison Ivy. Her green eyes were slightly narrowed while looking at the strange woman…she was one of Arkham's Doctors…shouldn't she be _dead_? By the looks of it, she was friends with the clown. And that could only mean more trouble. A small moan came from her left, but Pamela didn't move a muscle. The Penguin slowly sat up rubbing his forehead with the end of his fat fingers. "Ooh…What happened…?" His top hat was lying next to him, making his bald and pale head completely visible.

Before Pamela could say anything to him, he widened his eyes and looked at her with enthusiasm. "Did we win?!" Ivy only narrowed her eyes more before answering in a heavy and furious tone. "You could say that." The two characters near the unconscious Batman seemed to ignore them. The Penguin pointed at the blond woman while showing a small frown. "Who is that?" He asked, his breath smelling like fish. Pamela seemed to growl before standing up. "A dead woman." The short man titled his head while looking at the redhead and quickly understood they were cuffed to each other when Ivy pulled her wrist up, making him quickly get up.

"OY! Clown man!"

The Joker's smile seemed to almost touch his ears when he gazed at Pamela who had one of her hands resting on her hip. Ah, pretty Pam. Her beautiful face was now staring at him full of anger. "Just try to find something to free us from these!" Pamela shouted while raising her arm up high, forcing Penguin to get on the tip of his toes. Harleen blinked her eyes a couple of times before peeking over her shoulder, to see who was calling her _pumpkin. _

It was then that her arms quickly unwrapped Joker's neck. They only realized where she'd gone when she punched Poison Ivy across the face, making her fall on the floor. "…You'd like to hit me again? Huh? HUH?!" The blond girl's hands grabbed Pamela's neck tightly while the redhead's hand grabbed a big amount of Harleen's hair, trying to force her to stop. Next to that fight was Penguin, trying to slide away from the two women, but stuck due to the hand-cuffs.

The Joker laughed loudly while crossing the road, his hand dragging the Bat by his cape easily, like he was a mere plastic bag. "Now, now, Harley, calm down." The blond didn't release the redhead from her hands. It was like she hadn't heard the Joker at all. And poor Pamela's beautiful visage began to turn red. "Calm down, Harley…" The Joker repeated in a softer tone while placing a hand on the Doctor's shoulder. But her pretty and fragile hands didn't let go. The Joker's smile vanished once he saw Poison Ivy's green eyes struggling to keep open. She was killing her…Harley was killing Pamela…How dared she? She had already knocked the Batman down; Joker wouldn't let her scratch another line of his "To Do" list.

"I said CALM DOWN you little fart!"

His hand suddenly grabbed the doctor's arm tightly and threw her across the air, making her land at least a meter away from them. On of her cute pink cheeks was facing the dirty road, scratched from the impact. But the Clown Prince seemed indifferent about her state. Instead he gave a huge mocking smile while turning his face to Pamela who now coughed furiously, her red hair covering her entire face. Dr. Quinzel was stronger than she looked like. The Penguin's eyes were wide open while he discreetly tried to understand if the blond woman was still conscious.

"Deep breaths, Pams…deep breaths."

The Joker said, chuckling under his breath. Ivy peeked from the middle of her bright orange hair, her green eyes narrowing to their maximum. "Just get rid of these cuffs." She growled, her once sweet and calm voice seeming heavier now. Like she had something stuck on her throat. The Joker smiled widely while revealing a small key that he had found hidden in a compartment of the Bat's belt. He tossed it to Ivy who quickly unlocked the cuffs. The Penguin seemed to mumble something about how strange women were, but Pamela preferred to ignore him.

"So, Pam? What do you say?"

The Joker had a big red smile while looking at Pamela. That big mocking smile, dying for her to say 'thank you' or for her to shout something at him. The redhead looked down, closed her fists and gave a small sigh, trying to clear her head from any violent thoughts. Ivy tried…but instead her fist punched the pale man's cheek, making him turn his head and close his eyes tight. Both Penguin and Harley gasped at that sight. They knew what the Joker was capable off…had Pamela lost her marbles?!

And although the clown's mouth kept smiling, his eyes seemed terribly serious now. Pamela's frown seemed to slowly disappear while his green eyes stared at her. It was then that Ivy realized. He was _angry_. The Joker's eyes revealed how furious the man was. The hand that had punched him felt numb and weak. But instead of yelling the Joker slowly revealed his bright yellow teeth in a grin that seemed to cause a cold shiver on the back of Pamela's neck.

She could see it. He wasn't smiling at her. He was smiling at the idea of poking her green eyes out of her face. He was smiling at the idea of chopping her body into pieces and making pieces of art out of them. He was smiling at her death. Suddenly a pair of comforting hands rested on the redhead's shoulders, and a cheek almost rubbed on hers'. "S-Say, Mr. Jay...shouldn't we start thinkin' about what to do with the…er… Bat…?" Pamela's eyes widened slightly while shifting between the Doctor and the Clown.

The Joker's narrowed eyes looked at Harleen for a couple of seconds. Her cute little face was right next to Pamela's. They were so different and yet both so beautiful. Of course, Ivy was much more woman like. Her eyes seemed to always stare at him in a seductive way, like she was stretching her hand, waiting for him to grab it. She knew what men wanted. And Harley…she had beautiful baby blue eyes that seemed to be constantly shining. Her small mouth seemed to always have a pink colour and she always had a sweet and soft smell of strawberries on her skin and hair. The Joker often found himself wishing he could turn her inside out, just to check if she was that adorable on the inside.

Either way, both of them deserved a big red smile on their faces. And one of them would have one, sooner or later. That image made the Joker chuckle in a low tone while turning his back to both ladies. "You're right, _Harley_." Ivy felt the woman's hands holding her shoulders tighter when he pronounced her name. His eyes looked down at the Batman and his smile now reached his ears. "We've got to do something BIG for our BIG boy…" The Penguin was suddenly standing next to Ivy and Harley, cleaning the dust off of his clothes.

"We'll take him to the Ice club," the short and funny-looking man said. "It should be closed by now. And I…" His fat hand suddenly revealed a long silver key. "…Own the place." The Penguin was actually trying to impress the other villains, but the only answer he received was a small laugh from the Joker who placed his large and cold hand on the fat man's shoulder. "Hah, Oz, my boy, we're going to give Batsy the best birthday party he's ever seen!" His slim and long arm was suddenly around Penguin's back, forcing him to move forward. The short man blinked his eyes quickly while looking up at the Joker. "Wha…What are you planning?" He asked nervously, afraid that that mad man would destroy his club. But the Joker simply smiled and nodded his head. "Well…I have this idea…" He suddenly stopped walking and looked at the two ladies who hadn't moved an inch with a warm grin.

"Oh, Harley dear, you don't mind if we use _your_ car, do you?"

The blond haired woman gave a shy white smile while looking at him. Pamela could swear her hands were melting. "Not at all, mistah Jay…" The green haired man then looked at Ivy. She almost gasped when they crossed looks. He was planning. Planning something that would get her in trouble if not kill her. She was sure of it. But he suddenly spoke. "…And Pams…be a dear and carry that with you." He said, chuckling under his breath while pointing at Batman.

Once he turned his back to the women, Harleen gave a small sigh of relief, never releasing Poison Ivy. The redhead narrowed her eyes and quickly shrugged her shoulders, releasing herself from the other woman's grasp. Both big green eyes looked with an upset look at Harleen who had a slightly confused expression on her face. Harley couldn't understand why that frown was on the pretty woman's face.

"Why did you do that?"

Harley's blue eyes narrowed, still not fully understanding what she was talking about. But Ivy continued. "You think you did me some kind of favour, huh? That I'm going to protect you because you did the same for me?" The blond woman widened her eyes and suddenly giggled at Ivy's frustration. "Protect ya?" The woman pointed at Pamela with one of her tiny and pale fingers, a mocking smile on her face. "Listen, red, I hated your guts ten minutes ago. I just wanted to see that pretty face of yours turn blue…" Harleen's finger stopped pointing at Pamela and gave a carefree shrug instead.

"But Mistah Jay seems to like ya. You make him laugh!"

A cheerful little smile was on her face while looking at Pamela who seemed to be slightly disgusted at the devotion that that woman had for that madman. Ivy's lips gestured a small _"Right"_ and shook her head slightly while placing both hands on her hips. But Harley wasn't finished. A disturbing grin was now on her face while eyeing the pretty woman. "I didn't protect ya, red. I saved your _ass_ from bein' _ripped off_."

Pam's eyes widened when hearing her voice, she felt like a bucket of ice cold water had been thrown at her face. The look that Joker had thrown her made it clear that he wanted to kill her. No, not kill her…something worse. Much worse and macabre than that. The redhead looked at Harley with wide green eyes, and the Doctor's blue eyes seemed to smile at her. She had saved her life from being thorn into pieces in that instance.

Pamela blinked her eyes quickly and walked in the unconscious bat's direction, clumsily grabbing his long dark cape with both hands, trying to keep herself busy. But when Ivy tried dragging the large man, he only moved a couple of inches. This was going to be harder than she thought…But suddenly her blue eyed _friend_ was standing by her side, both little hands also wrapped around the dark cape. Harley smiled at Ivy while also trying to drag him. Pamela Isley couldn't help but to release a small warm smile. It felt like she was saying _thanks_.

Both women fallowed the Joker and the Penguin while dragging the Batman with them. And although that was a hard (and quite heavy) work, both Ivy and Harley had a small smile on their faces. "You know what, red?" The blond woman asked while glancing at the other female. "I think this can be the beginnin' of a _beautiful_ friendship."

Pamela chuckled and kept looking forward, trying to ignore Harleen...

But she was beginning to like that girl; she really was.

--

Sorry for the delay guys. School is back from the dead...

_Forts:_ Thank you very much. Your comment made me feel a little bit more confident about my english grammar. And I hope to hear more from you soon.

_pride1289: _Er...I'm...glad you like...Harley? I personaly like ending my chapters with suspense...letting the reader wonder what can happen next. I'm sorry if you think that's...uhm...'_gay_'.


	6. The Art of C H A O S 6

The Penguin's Club was much more impressive than any of the villains had imagined.

It looked like an enormous sparkling ice cube, isolated from the tall and old buildings that Gotham had. It even had a red carpet coming out from those huge glass doors, for celebrities and other VIP people. Harleen's blue eyes were wide open, just like her small mouth. She looked like a kid on Disney Land. It was almost too obvious that she was seeing herself, wearing a long red dress, leaving a huge black limo, which would have a big and beautiful driver, ready to do anything for Harley. That made the blond woman giggle.

Pamela's green eyes looked unimpressed while driving Harley's dark blue car. She'd been there before, and although the first visit had made her eyes widen to their maximum, she was now used to it. The sparkles and lights didn't have the same impact they had at first. But the redhead had to admit, it was pretty darn impressive. While she worked as a botanist, she hadn't dreamed that she could be visiting a place like that. Actually, until a few days ago, Ivy didn't even _know_ it existed. And, although she wouldn't admit it, Pamela felt pretty important every time her feet touched that club's cold floor.

The Joker was, actually, uninterested. His face showed the usual large smile and the usual insane and wide open eyes, not even bothering to glance at the building. Instead he was staring forward, lost in thoughts. Lost in ideas of how to break the Batman. He wouldn't kill him, heavens no. And he wouldn't dare to take off his mask just like that. That would be just too…predictable. He needed something different, something that would make the Batman snap. It would be glorious to prove his point. To prove that anyone could just go insane. Oh, how he would love to watch the Batman laughing out loud…

The Penguin had a small smile while admiring his club from the corner of his eye. He was quite proud of that gigantic iceberg of his. It made him feel important. That place was usually full of celebrities and powerful people. Oswald was quite sure he'd shaken hands with every single celebrity who had ever passed Gotham City. All except one…Bruce Wayne. Oh, that guy made Penguin quite angry. Although he'd invited him for so many special events in his amazing club, that rich bastard had never showed up. Not even once! Oswald wasn't sure what made him angrier about that Mr. Wayne…the fact that he ignored him completely, or the fact that he was richer than him! The Penguin seemed to suddenly swallow nervously, his eyes staring outside of the car's window. He was so excited about showing how magnificent his club was that he forgot about the dark caped guest that now slept like a baby on the trunk of his car…

The Batman.

They had caught the God damned Batman, and the only one who seemed to realize that was him! The car suddenly stopped, right in front of the club's door. There was no need to be discreet; every single crook knew that if they ever stole something from The Penguin they'd have their hands cut off. Mr. Oswald was quite known between the criminals that walked Gotham streets. Mobsters, shoplifters, everyone knew that if you messed with the Penguin, you'd soon be shark bait. But just because Oswald was known between the lower class criminals, that didn't make him popular between the big shots like The Joker. His fat little hand turned into fists while his teeth bitted his lower lip. Oh God…The Joker. He had brought that madman to his perfect little club! Who knew what he was going to do to it!

"Well, Ozzy…"

The Penguin gave a small gasp when feeling a long cold hand touching his shoulder. His wide open eyes quickly looked to his left only to find The Joker smiling at him. That smile…it seemed like he could see right trough Oswald. Like there were two cold and dirty hands sticking their fingers inside his brain. "…Shall we…?" The green haired man almost seemed to sing those words. That made The Penguin twitch his left eye slightly. "_What have I gotten myself into…?"_ He thought while quickly opening the car's door and stepping outside. The short man seemed to sigh when feeling the cold wind blowing softly against his face. He had to try seeing the bright side of this situation, right? He'd finally get rid of that Batman and after that…well, after that it would be easy to take over. The Joker got out of the car, still dressing Arkham's orange uniform. He looked down at the short fat man and patted the top of his hat, like he was some kind of pet of his. "Not bad, Oz, not bad at all!" Joker said, staring curiously at the huge club.

Meanwhile, Poison Ivy remained on her seat, grabbing the car's wheel tightly while looking forward with a serious expression. She was lost between thoughts. Most of those thoughts involved The Joker and his unpredictable mood changes. Most thoughts also involved the question _"How long do I have left…?"_ After all, although he hadn't said anything, The Joker had basically promised to kill Pamela. It was only a question of time now. Ivy would have to kill him first before he got to her. Her green gloves made a strange noise while her hands grabbed the wheel even more tightly, making Harleen's nose twitch. That sound was worse than hearing someone scratching a black board with long French nails! "What's gotten into you, Red?" Harley asked with a small confused look on her pretty round face. "Ever since you got inside the car you turned all cranky, like you need to poop!" The blond woman said, looking extremely serious, like the sentence she had just said was extremely natural.

The redhead didn't seem to catch the joke. She glared at Harleen with furious green eyes, her hands never releasing the wheel. An awkward moment of silence came up while both women stared at each other; Pamela had both eyes narrowed to their maximum while Harley had hers wide open, full of curiosity and confusion. Harleen got slightly closer to Ivy while blinking her eyes innocently and cleared her throat, like she was about to tell her a secret. "…You don't need to poop, do you?" Pamela swirled her head in her direction and frowned while widening her green eyes, her hands still glued to the wheel. "OF COURSE NOT!" She yelled, making The Penguin's eyes widen to their maximum. He tapped on the car's window while making a frustrated expression. "What are you doing in there…?" Oswald asked with his usual penguin-like voice. "We need to get the Bat out of the trunk." He said in a severe tone. Oswald seemed to be about to say something else when he noticed that the Joker was already walking in the entrance's direction. With a small gasp, The Penguin hurried to fallow the Clown Prince of Crime, leaving the two women to take care of the caped vigilante…again.

Poison Ivy gave a small sigh while massaging the sides of her head with the tip of her fingers. "Sure, let the women take care of everything." She mumbled under her breath while Harley gave a long sigh while watching The Joker talking with The Penguin while the short man opened the Club's door with his little key. The blond haired woman couldn't take her eyes off of Joker. She felt like she was melting while watching that pale and insane man smile and talk. Without noticing it she was giggling. That image made Ivy roll her eyes. "Seriously…" Pamela started, catching the Doctor's attention. "…What do you _see_ in that guy?" The redhead asked, shaking her head lightly. She would understand if some respected him, even if some admired him…but that intelligent and beautiful woman was actually in love with that madman! Harleen blinked her eyes a couple of times and then sighed once again, her eyes blinking lazily while looking back at The Joker. Her small pink mouth showed a small smile while looking back at Pamela.

"He makes me laugh…"

Ivy's expression softened up slightly. Not that she was happy with that kind of answer, but she had understood something. Harleen was almost as mad as Joker was. Suddenly both women turned their heads in the club's direction when hearing something crashing, fallowed by a loud laughter and a small _"ARGH!"_ The Joker had obviously begun partying already. "Let's get the Bat." Poison Ivy finally said while getting out of the car, slamming the door with more strength than needed. Harleen would quickly do the same and fallow the redhead to the back of the car. When the opened the trunk's door they found the dark caped hero. The only thing that indicated that that was in fact a human being was his mouth and chin. The only part of his body that wasn't covered by some dark cloth. Both Pamela and Harleen stood there for a couple of seconds, staring at the vigilante with serious faces. It all seemed just too…surreal. They had actually caught the Big Bad Bat…Pam was the first one to grab the man's arms tightly, while Harley clumsily grabbed his feet.

He was way heavier than they remembered him. Yet, they carried him until the entrance of the club, Harley huffed while staring at the ceiling, making sure she wouldn't trip on anything while Pamela made her best effort to not look tired. But the blond woman's eyes seemed to sparkle once they entered inside the club. It was beautiful. Everything seemed made out of…of ice. Maybe some crystal here and then, but it seriously looked like they were in North Pole. Everything seemed so fresh and clean and yet it all seemed fragile at the same time. It was like a perfect ice cavern, with beautiful round tables, surrounded by crystal chairs, a large white stage with huge light blue curtains and a small crystal bar…Both Ivy and Harley stopped walking and widened their eyes to their maximum when seeing a huge amount of pieces of glass on the floor. The Joker laughed out loudly while Oswald pointed at him and yelled phrases like "Do you have any idea how much these cost?!" and "You broke EVERY single one!"

When hearing the Joker laugh like that, Harley couldn't help but to sigh. Her knees felt rubbery and her hands suddenly released the Batman's legs, making Pamela release a huge gasp and fall on her butt. The hero was just too heavy for one person to carry him. Pamela mumbled to herself while trying to move the Batman away from her. Both The Joker and The Penguin quickly looked in their direction when hearing that loud noise, like a bag of potatoes had just fallen on the floor. The short man narrowed his eyes, too upset to say or do anything. Those crystal glasses had cost him a fortune, and that mad clown had just decided to break all of them for no apparent reason! Oswald quickly turned his back and walked into a small room where the brooms and mops were kept.

The Joker chuckled while watching his _friend_ angrily walk away. "Oh, lighten up, Ozzy! They're just glasses…" He shouted, his cheerful voice echoing through the entire club. Penguin seemed to mumble something back, but his voice was too low for anyone to understand what he said. Joker's head then turned in Harley's, Ivy's and, of course, Batman's direction. His large red smile seemed to grow even bigger when seeing the dark caped man lying on the floor. The Batman was unconscious…The Joker could do whatever he wanted with him…The green haired criminal gave a small excited chuckle under his breath. "Harley, won't you be a dear and fetch me some decent clothing?" The pale man asked while walking in their direction. Dr. Quinzel kept on smiling while looking into The Joker's eyes, like she hadn't heard what the man said. Only when he was a couple of centimetres away from her did Harley react. "Right away, Mistah Jay…" She sighed before walking in the door's direction, never taking her eyes from the Clown Prince of Crime who smiled widely at her.

Pamela was cleaning the inexistent dust out of her tight suit, her beautiful face frowning while looking down at the Batman. He had recognized her. He knew her true identity and who she was…The redhead's expression softened. When she was a botanist she had always been shy and quiet, hiding herself behind big glasses and dedicating her time to plants rather than people. She was usually ignored by the rest of the world, and yet, The Batman knew her. Ivy's green eyes blinked softly while looking down at the unconscious hero. Why did she suddenly feel a certain sympathy for him…? Suddenly the redhead widened her eyes when finding The Joker standing right in front of her, that strange disturbing eyes staring at her in a malicious way. "Pam…"She felt a small chill on the back of her neck. The way how her name was pronounced seemed to be extremely slow and devious, like she could hear what horrible things went through his mind. "…Could you put our guest on the top of that table?"

Ivy could have spoken back to him. She could have told him to do it himself. But the way how those two insane eyes looked at her…it just made Pamela swallow her pride and do as he said. The redhead calmly wrapped her hands around the hero's cape and dragged him until the big round table that was near the stage. It was weird. Pam remembered how Batman felt extremely heavy, but now he seemed much lighter. Perhaps it was because Ivy wasn't focused on the hero's weight, but on the psychopathic clown that watched her every move with a smile on his face. She grabbed the man's arms and pulled him up, making his torso land on the top of the table. Pamela frowned slightly when hearing a small chuckle coming from behind her. That clown just stood there watching, like she was putting up a show for him. Pamela tried to bite her tongue so she wouldn't say anything she'd regret. She then grabbed the Bat's legs, placing them on the top of the table; finally! The Batman was ready to be served. His arms hanged from the table and his feet seemed to be about to fall from the table.

Pamela gave a small sigh of relief while placing her hands on her hips. "Anything else, _Mr. Jay_?" She asked with a sarcastic tone. It was impossible to hide her dislike for that man. It was even harder to hide it when thinking about the way he used and manipulated that woman. He obviously wasn't crazy about her either. The redhead wondered when he would strike. When would he snap and slit her throat…? Apparently, sooner than she thought. A cold and long hand suddenly grabbed her neck tightly, making Pamela release a loud gasp and widen her eyes to their maximum, her hands instinctively grabbed Joker's wrist tightly when feeling her back hitting the round table where the Batman now rested. Her head would hit the hero's stomach…it was hard as rock and it hurt her quite a bit. While one hand held Pamela's neck, another one grabbed her long red hair tightly, making Ivy make a small sound of pain. The Joker smiled widely while looking at her. The woman tried to gasp for air, both of her eyes were closed tightly while struggling against the man's grasp, but The Joker simply laughed in a low and delighted tone. "Ah, doesn't this bring you memories, Pams?" He asked after giving a long sigh, like he was breathing fresh air. But Ivy simply pressed her teeth against each others, trying to get free. Who'd say that man could be so strong? "It was just like our first meeting…!" He said, his eyes widening while he spoke. His eyes narrowed slightly while he looked up, like he was trying to remember something. "All that is missing is…ha!I know!" His hand suddenly released her head and took something from behind his back. Ivy widened her eyes and opened her mouth slightly while the green haired man kept on smiling. "…A small piece of glass…" Poison Ivy frowned while trying to sink her fingertips into the man's skin, but it didn't seem to affect him in any way.

That useless bird man and the crazy doctor were too busy doing God knows what…And Ivy just couldn't get free. Was The Joker really going to kill her…?

Was it really going to end up like this…?

--

I'm terribly sorry for taking such a long time.

For a long time I lost my Batman muse and focused more on school and music…

But I received an e-mail that made me quite excited from one of you readers.

So I decided to finish this chapter (even if I wanted to make it even longer).

I'm very thankful for all of your comments and messages! They are quite encouraging and cheerful. It was thanks to them that I finished writing this chapter! Thank you and sorry once again!


End file.
